


Take Me To Church

by ImaniJoain



Series: Unlikely Singularities [11]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Friendship, Pregnancy, parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 05:30:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11914203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImaniJoain/pseuds/ImaniJoain
Summary: Bucky can't decide whether he should laugh with or at his friend as Steve works through his new reality with Darcy. Tony is hitting his stride with this whole parenting thing - or at least not actively panicking about it. And all three men can agree that inviting the Avengers-adjacent ladies to use the gym was an excellent idea.  *Takes place 6/27/17





	Take Me To Church

**Author's Note:**

> I promise I'm still writing - slowly. I finished this scene pre-stupidity-hand-breaking so hopefully it can help fill the time gap between posts. I hope you enjoy it!

_**June 28, 2017** _

 

“The modern kids have a word for this, punk. Stalking.” Barnes closed the door to the locker room and leaned one shoulder against the wall next to Steve.

Steve replied absently, “Uh-huh. Sure, jerk.”

Barnes raised an eyebrow at that. Steve had been out of it since the incursion at the upstate facility. Not that anyone blamed him. Barnes had nearly broken his other leg trying to get up to the roof after Darcy and Jane had disappeared – and he had only suspected that Darcy was pregnant. The look on Steve’s face when she told him had been priceless; Barnes only got to see it because he was in the infirmary with Cho while Vivas did some post-galaxy-hopping bloodwork and an ultrasound on Darcy. Steve had been worried and more than a little suspicious – hovering over her and asking every five seconds if she was okay. Barnes was pretty sure he had irritated Darcy into telling him in front of an audience. Then she had blurted it out, “I’m pregnant,” and having a broken bone was completely worth getting to see Steve’s transformation.

Confusion. Shock. Happiness. Worry. Elation. More worry. Anger. Even more worry. In the end sheer joy had battled it out with his barely checked fury that Darcy had been in danger. Darcy and the baby. Barnes felt Steve handled it pretty well, he managed to wait a whole twelve hours before he instituted a new set of safety procedures for her. It included Darcy staying in the tower or at the upstate facility whenever Steve was out on mission. It was a good thing the protocols had been worked out quickly, since the team was called into action only a few days later. Steve operated fine in the field, strategizing and calling out orders with the same precision as always, but as soon as they had any down time he was staring out into empty space, a weird sort of half-smile, half-gob-smacked-loose-jaw expression on his face.

It was funny, at least for the time being. Barnes wasn’t sure if it would get old before Steve snapped out of it. Worst case scenario, they had another thirty or so weeks of it before Steve would have to shake into action. In the meantime, they had returned from a few relatively easy days on mission – both Barnes and Friday had called Darcy as soon as they returned, he wasn’t going to repeat that ass chewing anytime soon if he could avoid it – and Steve had gone to see her the second they landed.

Debrief over, the team put the Tower locker rooms to good use, washing off a few days worth of sweat and grime. Barnes had taken his time, only Sam was still in the showers, singing some god-awful tune to himself. Steve had rushed through, not even bothering to shave, and stood against the wall of the gym, watching the training mat.

Barnes snorted to himself. Training was not what he would call the activity currently taking place. Loud music was pulsing in the gym, a strong rhythm and not-horrible lyrics. Natasha, Pepper, Darcy, and little Maria were standing in a loose semi-circle with their backs to the locker room door. They were all sweaty, so he figured whatever exercise they had been doing was over. _Yoga, probably,_ he decided. He had seen both Pepper and Natalia practicing the deep stretches. Pepper made it look peaceful. Natalia made it look deadly. Barnes followed Steve’s eye line, which was firmly on Darcy. Darcy in her tight, knee length pants and a loose tank top. _Definitely stalking._

“You gonna buy that, or just window shopping?”

“Yeah, uh-huh. Sure, Buck...” There was a long pause before Steve’s forehead wrinkled. “What?”

Barnes chuckled. “Pretty sure you’ve seen it before,” he nodded to Darcy, noting the women were starting to break into two rows. “What with the bun in the oven, I’d figure you had enough hands on experience...” Barnes trailed off, forgetting the dig he had been planning at Steve’s expense. The women had been clumped around a blond in shorts and a sports bra. It took him a moment to pull his scrambled brain away from the decorative straps across her chest and the toned, golden legs on display to identify her. His training kicked in while his eyes were tracing the long, braided pony tail that hung down her back.

_Vivas. Evelyn Gertrude. M.D. Obstetrics and Genetics Specialist. Surgical Training. Security Level Two. Defense Priority Two. Threat Level One._

Ms. Potts’ personal physician, and now Darcy’s obstetrician, was standing at the front of the mat, facing the other four ladies as a new song started. Barnes sucked in a breath and held it for a count of five, as if he was preparing for an attack. He had seen a lot of the modern world since he escaped HYDRA. A lot of it would have been shocking to him in 1944, but he would have appreciated it all the same. Hundreds of flavors of ice cream. Air conditioning. _Bikinis._ What the Doc was doing on the training mat might have been both the best and worst shock he had experienced to date. It was dancing, sure, he recognized that, but it was the most suggestive dancing he had ever seen in broad daylight. Maybe even in dark back rooms too. _Takes a close second to that brothel in Chamonix where Steve almost choked on his tongue and Dugan spent six months of back pay._

“Dr. Vivas says Darcy needs more low-impact cardio,” Steve said in a low voice. His eyes were still on the mother of his child, for which Barnes was grateful. He touched his metal hand to his chin to make sure his mouth was closed and then kept it there to disguise his reaction. “She’s been doing yoga, I guess, with Pepper, but pregnancy can cause strain on the respiratory and circulatory system, so it’s important that she condition before the baby matures...” His recitation trailed off again as the lyrics repeated and the women shimmied their hips.

Again, Barnes couldn’t blame him. Darcy had a hell of a figure, he was sure she looked fantastic, but he couldn’t have said in that moment what color her shirt was, much less what she was doing. The doc did a two step forward, one step back move, a little like a Cuban dance he had seen before the war. Her stomach was flat, but not muscled like Nat or even Pepper. He knew she was moderately endowed in the chest department, but when she swiveled on one tennis shoe and bent at the waist he became aware of an extremely wonderful attribute that her modest skirts had disguised.

Dr. Evelyn Vivas had a fantastic ass.

“Thank god I didn’t miss it.” Stark’s abrupt arrival had Barnes mentally shifting to keep his thoughts concealed behind the cool veneer of a soldier. There were few things he could imagine more irritating that having Tony Stark discover something to tease him over. Ogling a woman would be high on Stark’s list of things to mercilessly harp on about. “I was talking you yahoos through that mess in Haiti yesterday during yoga. That is a travesty. Wait – do the golden oldies know about yoga? It’s-”

“We know,” Steve interrupted calmly, finally seeming to shake out of the hypnotized lull he had fallen into. Apparently Captain America was susceptible to mesmerism, but only if Darcy’s breasts were the focus. “Sam took us through the stretches modern Special Forces practice to prevent injury.”

“Prevent-” Stark huffed. “I am disappointed in both of you. I expect the Ice Princess to ignore everything that doesn’t concern the mission.” Barnes stiffened and had to force himself to relax again. He knew Tony was trying to make things more normal between them, as normal as it could be for a man and the person who had murdered his parents, but the constant digs always put him on edge. “But you, Steve, you have access to all the practical applications! Appreciate the benefits, old man!”

“I’m younger than you, Tony,” Steve responded dryly. The music was winding down and Steve’s mouth twitched in amusement, “Younger, and with a much healthier heart. With your medical history, you probably shouldn’t get overly excited.”

The women were disbanding, slinging towels around their necks and smiling. For the first time since he had gotten his mind back, Barnes wished he had an opportunity for some practical application. Wished, and for a moment, considered how he might go about it. His break from reality didn’t last long.

Tony flicked Barnes’ exposed metal arm with one fingernail. It reminded him exactly why wishing was pointless. _Metal arm. Swiss cheese brain. List of confirmed kills as long as my leg._ “Hear that, Elsa? He made an inappropriate joke. About a lady. For shame.”

“Like you should talk.” Shorter than the adults and stealthier than he had given her credit for, Maria snorted as she walked past.

“That wounds me, Junior. Wounds me deeply.” Tony placed on hand over his heart and frowned at the girl, who didn’t pause in her walk to the women’s locker room.

“Yeah, right, Dad. Pull the other one.”

“Pull the-” Tony whirled and pointed a finger in Steve’s face. “You’ve been teaching my kid olden talk. I demand you stop before she becomes uncool.”

“It wasn’t me,” Steve insisted weakly, already walking away with a smile for Darcy.

“Get over it Tony,” Pepper interjected with a sweaty kiss to his cheek that Tony leaned into. “What is old is new again.”

“Vintage vocabulary,” Doc Vivas said thoughtfully. She carefully considered Steve, then Barnes. He had to fight not to flinch away from her inspection. “Aces.”

Steve laughed, Darcy and Pepper chuckled, and Tony demanded that everyone stop ganging up on him. Barnes kept his metal fist firmly over the lower half of his face until he slipped out into the corridor. His grin was so wide it hurt.


End file.
